I honestly don't write here as often as I really should. It is after all one of the few active avenues of escape from the stresses of everyday life left open to me anymore. It's not like I don't think about it, or forget I have it, it's a bit more like the inner editor that hides in the dark recesses in my mind taking his blue pencil and striking out the text I would put here, with the notation of too private, too embarrassing, wrong message, or just WTF are you talking about...
With that said I'm writing today about.... LOL I'm really not sure what I am writing about in fact. Right now my head is buzzing with the background noise of way too many thoughts and lists that must get done, and the realization that there simply is not enough time to do it all.
I remember a time when the holidays were a time of laughter and joy, and something I looked forward to. In many ways I still do look forward to them, but with a week left before Thanksgiving I'm looking at the holiday after that and scratching my head about all that I need to do for that.
Essentially at this point I'm a single parent... No don't read that wrong there is nothing wrong with my marriage.. no that comment is more generated from the realities of schedules, work loads, and the day to day demands of raising children when one parent is workingthe graveyard shift, and a part time afternoon job. With M away so much, a lot more falls onto me to get done. It's tough, but with routines finally settling into place it's getting easier (to an extent.) But still there are not enough hours in the day to get everything that must be done... done.
And that just speaks on the main chores, or regular daily living and such...
So on top of all that I finished a project that was long overdue... The kids room, and the bunk beds... I can't say much more than they're done, and finally up and being used. Refinishing them was easy, getting them assembled... not so much. (And yes I damaged my back again doing it because I was working alone...)
I'm not angry about it, rather jsut sad. Right now I'm exhausted because of lack of sleep, so it's getting harder to put words together right now. I used to say it was time to rest when the words start jumping on the screen in front of me, but I'm far past that... Just ask the dancing keys on my keyboard if you don't beleive me...lol
